Cayla Bellamy, bassoon
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Blog

Postings arise as time permits
and inspiration hits. Contact me
to request a special topic!

The Great Side Wire Experiment: The Final

10/9/2020

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The verdict is in.

I have officially put in all I am willing to input for a blank to become a functioning, stage ready reed. We all have our breaking point, and sometimes the product just isn't worth the resources. For your reference, here are a few examples of ones that are "worth it" in my mind - asymmetry that responds to a single scrape (image one) - and ones that aren't - persistent sideslipping (image two) and separated blades (image three).
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After another one or two sessions on each reed, adjusting according to my priorities:

1. RESPONSE
2. INTONATION
3. FLEXIBILITY
4. TONE

I subjected each reed to my final checklist:
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As you can see, 13/15 constitutes a passing score for me - generally suitable for other humans to hear. This is a B+ reed that is functional for the average situation. If a reed is destined for the stage, it must (MUST) score a 100% and sound beautiful.  Here are the scores for the remaining blanks from each batch:

Seam Aligned "Side" Wire Placement:
- 13
- 10
- 8
- 7
- 2... yikes

Standard Wire Placement:
- 12
- 13
- 14
- and... two 15s!

The bright blue wrapped, standard wire placement formed unicorn made its stage debut on my fall faculty recital, and its rainbow wrapped compatriot hopped in the mail to a student of mine to live on through the Iowa All State audition process.

Hear one of theme in this teaser of the lovely second movement of  Jenni Brandon 's Colored Stones, then check out the full recital through the link above!

Much like some reeds being potential products that are not worth the process, I find myself reflecting on methods in the same manner, and with this set of cane, in these circumstances, for these purposes I think I will be leaving my formation process just as it is.

... until the next experiment comes along.
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The Great Side Wire Experiment: Part Three

9/14/2020

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Did you skip Parts One and Two? Don't do that!

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After an exceptionally long covid-driven "curing period," nine* of the original blanks made to compare seam aligned wires with traditional top-bottom wire placement have made it to my practice box, and the results are fascinating.

*RIP bright blue seam aligned, a hapless victim of knocking my phone off the filing cabinet. A truly senseless crime.

In the interest of full disclosure, I opened all of these reeds early in the Pandemic Blankapalooza, played all of them for 30-45 minutes, then stuffed them in a box and moved them a mile into the air with my relocation from Iowa to Colorado. The good news is that all underwent the same change. The bad news is that results are also at least partially the result of clipped blank babies moving to altitude.

After almost three months of timeout, all underwent my second scrape process, which looks a little something like this:
​
After this, the blanks sat for another couple of days, each receiving a scale or two play time to help navigate last weeks snow (!!) and get us back to something that looks like the end of summer in terms of both heat and humidity.

Last night, each received a basic balancing scrape based on visual assessment and crow. Then came this morning...
​
Traditional Top-Bottom Wire Twists
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Experimental Seam-Aligned Wire Twists
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Pull yourself together, side wires. Look at that asymmetry!

Then I played them, standard three octave C Major with triads:
​
Traditional Top-Bottom Wire Twists
Experimental Seam-Aligned Wire Twists
While a bit stiffer than I am accustomed to with sea level fresh clips and a reasonable, non-covid amount of time between first and second scrapes, the traditional twist reeds felt predictable and fairly consistent across registers, and you can hear the similarity between options.

The seam aligned wire experiments, though, varied wildly. As I anticipated from the warped apertures, they felt awfully stuffy and limited, though the wider throat, as pictured in the original post, kept the pitch very low - definitely far too low for poor Number Two of the pack. But was the collapse all in my head? The seam alignment *should* keep things open enough for higher air volume, right? Was the volume at the sacrifice of structure?

To the measurements once more:

Traditional Top-Bottom Wire Twists
Experimental Seam-Aligned Wire Twists
Indeed, not all in my head.

​The sensitivity on the lower end of the spectrum will come with final tip finishing, so I am not concerned with that. What's up with that collapsing on the upper end for all the side wires, though? Certainly not what I would hope for, but not outside the realm of adjustability. These wire placements simply prioritized opposite ends of my stability-flexibility spectrum:

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!!​So, the plan...

For the Traditional Top-Bottom Wire Twists:
  • prioritize response in finishing tip angles
  • reduce spine strength in the back third
  • increase heart focus via front channels

​For the Experimental Side Wire Twists:
  • relieve pressure on collapsing wings via heart
  • correct asymmetrical aperture with finishing tip angles
  • increase side-to-side taper via middle to back rails

​Part Four the Final coming soon!
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The Great Side Wire Experiment: Parts One and Two

4/13/2020

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After much ado, I have returned to the blogosphere to document a recent reed making experiment inspired by my friends in Blankapalooza 2020 and a series of photographs by my former sectionmate and bassoon whiz, Jacob Darrow. If successful, a very minor change in blank formation could greatly reduce or (*gasp?*) potentially eliminate the need for blade imbalance corrections after the initial scrape. Too good to be true?  Let's see.

The Hypothesis:
Uneven blade pressure, even slight, causes one blade to be more peaked than the other, which can lead to a host of issues - 
  • side slipping, due to one blade collapsing into the other
  • side slipping, due to torque of plier twisting wrenching one blade to the dominant side
  • asymmetrical spine strength, due to single-sided secondary curves and channel collapsing
  • constricted throat, due to over-tightening wires to achieve flush alignment with the tube

The double blades of bassoon reeds are acted upon by unequal forces and torques based on the method by which we assemble blanks - first and second wires twisted in opposite directions, pulling one blade inward then counteracting with an opposing pull. This is the classic wire placement. But what if the blades were acted upon with force instead to the sides? In theory, this would create balancing forces in a lateral "shifting" manner rather than directly upon the spine in a "squishing" manner. What if we eliminated the doing and undoing of uneven blade pressure during formation?

I thus hypothesized that placing wire twists along the seam of the reed as opposed to the spine can eliminate chronic side slipping, reduce asymmetry, and increase air volume through the throat.
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(standard wire up/down placement)
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(seam-aligned wire placement)

PART ONE - FORMING

The Method:
For this experiment, I used 14 pieces of cane from the same tube batch order; gouged, shaped, and profiled with the same instruments on the same day; dried and soaked matching times in the same humidor and water container, respectively; and formed in the same one hour sitting with the same tools and measurements. For my formation process, check out the "Resources" and "Documents" tabs in the menu above.

I was surprised in the initial formation that the seam-aligned approach saved me time, roughly four seconds per blank. This makes sense in hindsight, as it takes an extra tug or two for the slack in the standard placement method to make sure the full wire is flush with the newly rounded tube, rather than when pulling parallel to the oblong throat. This seems small, but a few seconds per blank adds up before long.
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(standard wire up/down placement)
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(seam-aligned wire placement)

The Observations:
Forming with my traditional method felt more comfortable but, as seen above, was a hair slower. As you take a look through the comparison photos below, you'll see a few observations:

1. Contrary to my hypothesis, it was easier to over-tighten the seam-aligned wires. I affectionately call these my muffin top reeds.
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(standard wire up/down placement)
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(seam-aligned wire placement)
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2. My hypothesis appears incorrect yet again in the constriction of the throat. The extra tug to round the tube fully via the second wire during forming appears to have consistently maintained the inner volume of the throat that fits so well with my beefy 201 and general approach to all things musical.
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(standard wire up/down placement)
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(seam-aligned wire placement)

3. Since I like the vibrant and live-wire experience of a brand new reed, I have no qualms about opening them immediately. You can see a continuation of the throat volume into a wider tip aperture. Score one for the seam-aligned, though, the blanks are more symmetrical across all four tip quadrants than my wild child standard tips. This is the only part of my hypothesis projecting accuracy.
(standard wire up/down placement)
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(seam-aligned wire placement)
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​PART TWO - SCRAPING

The Method:
All 14 blanks were dried overnight again, per my usual process, then I put in the thumbnail and tip, blending uniformly through the channels across the full batch. Regardless of experimentation, I complete identical first scrapes to all reeds, with the goal to be to define the front third of the reed and scrape the tip to within 0.1mm of my final goal thickness. With the profiler settings I use, this requires only a single scrape session and involves taking off less than 50% of the profiled tip thickness.

​After the "stock" tip and blending, I rested the blanks overnight in a humidor then gave what I referred to as a "good faith scrape" to tend to what each reed needed to fundamentally clear basic response and intonation variables before setting them aside to dedicate a specialized finishing scrape session to each.

​The Observations:
All this began with a crow...
(standard wire up/down placement)
(seam-aligned wire placement)
 As you might imagine, the flatter shape of the seam-aligned wires yielded an initially low crow and easy response, while my first sounds on the standard-wired system sounded all too familiar. In conclusion, however, both crowed in the realm of acceptable.

Sidebar - it is important for us to not allow either hope for a new method or comfort in an old one to guide our tests. Don't play better on the ones you want to sound good. This is true for reeds you wrap really pretty, too

More on that later, I am sure, but the purpose of that note here is to acknowledge that I dig the idea of something new and immediately responsive helping both my students and myself, so I inserted a few "blind" crows, where I crowed the reed without looking at or touching the wires to have an expectation for their performance. Aside from poking myself on fresh wire clippings, nothing surprising happened, and they performed similarly down the rack and received the same tips.

After two days' rest - happy weekend, everyone - I soaked and only made minor aperture adjustments to test the playability via a few stolen guitar waltzes, and what interesting surprises awaited me...
(standard wire up/down placement)
(seam-aligned wire placement)

Yikes.

The two racks now perform... opposite? The standard wire placement reeds have brightened and retained a large portion of their flexibility, and the seam-aligned reeds have completely seized. You can hear that both from the left column are bright, flat, and loud, the typical traits of a less aggressively tapered system that *should* have been set up moreso by the oblong second wires of the seam-aligned process. The right columned reeds are stuffy, sharp, and causing all sorts of neck veins to pop out as I play, which is not only glamorous but also, honestly, very unexpected.

A twist! A cliffhanger! Perhaps all three facets of my hypothesis are wrong!

​Stay tuned for the next round, coming soon...
​
PART THREE - FINISHING

​

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Bassoonists' Holiday 2018 Shopping Guide: Round One

11/21/2018

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Thoughtful holiday gifts for bassoonists can be tricky!  How do you best support your bassoon-crazed loved one and give them a gift they actually want?  As much as I have a soft spot in my heart for gifts such as these...
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... here is a quick shopping guide for items that your favorite bassoonist would be truly excited to receive.  Happy shopping!

On a budget?
Searching for stocking stuffers?
Secret Santa got you stumped?
​
Check out these options for under $15.

Cleaning and Maintenance
  • Silk Swab
  • Bocal Brush
  • Polishing Cloth
  • Precision Screwdriver Set
  • Key Oil

Reed Making
  • Reed Cases
Tool Handles
  • Aluminum
  • Wooden (Oak)
  • Wooden (Rosewood, Violetwood, Lilac)
Reed Thread
  • Hand Dyed
  • Multicolored
  • Bold Nylon
Forming Pins
  • Rigotti Tapered Aluminum
  • Pisoni Short Aluminum
  • Solution Long Tapered

Straps
  • Designer Seat Strap (Hook)
  • Cotton Seat Strap (Cup)

Convenience Accessories
  • Reed Soaker
  • Humistat
  • Dampit

In the market for a bigger purchase?
These are accessories ​with costs ranging $20-100.
Be sure to feel out your bassoonist for his/her interest!

​Instrument and Accessory Stands
  • Stand Tray
  • Fox Bassoon Stand
  • Hercules Bassoon Stand​

Electric Sounds
  • Little Jake Pickup
  • Gigpro Preamp
  • Sonnus MIDI Converter

Is your bassoonist a reader?
Here is an (extremely!) abbreviated list of some
​of my required and recommended readings.

  • Daniel Coyle - The Talent Code
  • Mark Eubanks - Quick Guide to Bassoon Reed Tuning
  • Barry Green - The Inner Game of Music
  • Don Greene - Performance Success
  • David McGill - Sound in Motion
  • Christin Schillinger - Bassoon Reed Making, A Pedagogic History
  • Maarten Vonk - Bundle of Joy
  • Arthur Weisberg - The Art of Wind Playing

For some extra fun and personalization...
make it a package or gift bag!

​Totes 
  • Squad
  • Reeds
  • Pop Art

Pouches
  • Manatee
  • Patent Drawing

Please feel free to comment and send me ideas of your own - round two may be just around the corner!
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On the "Why"

8/13/2018

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An observer in a wind ensemble rehearsal of mine recently asked why I spent so much valuable rehearsal time (upwards of 30 minutes from a two hour block, less than a week before the concert) leading the group through breathing exercises and chord building.

Why do we do this?

Particularly at the beginning of each academic year, musician after musician returns wholeheartedly to fundamentals routines, which inevitably wane as the stress piles.  Ensemble rehearsals begin, recitals are scheduled, juries loom... why do we "waste" this time and energy when we need to learn our "actual music"?  Better yet, for those students not majoring in music, why do we have to learn scales and perform seemingly-endless articulation and intonation exercises with metronomes and drones if our goal is solely to participate in large ensembles or play the occasional gig after graduation?

For you, the student, here are my various depths of answers to the questions you dare not ask:

Why long tones?

Level One: Long tones are the most basic thing we do - making a sound on our instrument.  If you can isolate the process of producing a sound, you can vastly improve your musical cake before attempting to put any icing on it.

Level Two: Long tones allow us to focus on the most basic setup of posture, support, tone, and intonation.  Play a single note with absolute focus on producing the exact sound you want, and your performance consistency will skyrocket.  A stunning long tone tapering to silence is one of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard.

Level Three: Long tones are precise and require control to master.  In all aspects of life, improvement and quality come most reliably with control.  We must practice control.

Why scales?

Level One: Scales are the building blocks of music, especially Western tonal music.  If you can learn the word (the scale) you don't have to sound it out (practice to face-palm status) every time you encounter a particular pattern.

Level Two: Scales allow us to focus on the most basic motions of air, embouchure, and finger technique.  Loop a pattern that is more automatic, and you have more brain power to dedicate to the things to which you need to mindfully attune in your playing.  A perfect scale, even in dynamic and tone across the full range of an instrument, is one of the most impressive performances I have ever heard.

Level Three: Scales are repetitive and require discipline to master.  In all aspects of life, improvement and quality come most steadily with discipline.  We must practice discipline.

Why practice records/listening logs/reflection reports?

Level One: Records remind you what you have done and what you need to do.  Memories are fallible, and we lose efficiency by repeating unnecessary work or forgetting to attend to something.

Level Two: Documentation allows us to find trends in our preparation.  Perhaps three hours of playing the morning of a lesson leads to a lower quality lesson than you might anticipate, or perhaps two days without practicing scales is too long to reliably recall new patterns.  Perhaps what feels like an eternity memorizing a concerto is, in reality, only ten minutes.  Analysis of my own practice perception compared to reality is one of the most eye-opening educational moments I have had.

Level Three: Recording preparation, progress, and achievements is reflective and requires self-awareness.  In all aspects of life, improvement and quality come most efficiently with self-awareness.  We must practice self-awareness.

So why do we do this?

As a teacher, my goal for you is to achieve the highest you can - as a person and as a professional.  I firmly believe that fundamentals not only build a solid foundation of skills on the instrument, but also one of the mental habits and emotional fortitude required to be successful in any capacity.  We do this because it will help you develop the control, discipline, and self-awareness you need for your next step in life.  We do this because it will make you better, in all aspects of the word.

Now, please excuse me.  I need to go practice my scales.
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On Running Lessons

9/25/2017

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With many hours of training runs and races this season, I had plenty of endurance zen time to contemplate my hours of practicing and performing music.  So many things feel the same between running and the disciplined study and presentation of music - both require a huge sacrifice of finances, time, and energy; both consolidate months of training into minutes or hours of performance; and, if you do them right, both are intense labors of love.

As I sat enjoying my post-race chocolate milk after a blistering hot half marathon last weekend, I realized how powerful these connections could be, if we could just distill them into usable advice.  What follows are nine things that running has taught me about music.


1. Check Your Form

When it gets hard, rely on fundamentals.  When the heat index is in the triple digits, and your shirt is soaked through with sweat, and you can't possibly lift your feet for one more step, runners know that you must stay mindful of how your arms pump to create momentum forward, which part of your foot hits the ground, and exactly how many minutes it has been since you last sipped your water.  When you are nearing the climax of your recital closer, and your embouchure is trembling, and your hands are shaking from nerves, top performers know that you must reconnect with your grounded posture and engage your airstream.  Fatigue makes us forgetful, and in stress we must all check our form.
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2. Plan Your Season

What is the top priority this year, your "A race"?  Is it really wise to impulse buy a 5K with friends and go all out one week before your targeted national ranking triathlon?  (In my case, absolutely not!)  Are you targeting graduate school or summer festival auditions?  Perhaps your junior or senior recital?  Naturally, the life of a musician requires balancing many high priority performances, but is it really wise to schedule your prescreening recording session the weekend before that regional orchestra audition?  If you have control over your schedule, plan wisely and sequence things in a way that makes sense for you, physically and mentally.

3. Take the Traveled Path (Sometimes)

When running on a trail in the woods, sometimes there are choices: jump the log or double back around it.  One adds difficulty, and the other adds distance, and anyone can make that choice based on their needs at the time.  In the academic world, this is the choice between taking a heavy course load one semester to graduate on time and keeping your schedule manageable but adding a summer or semester (or year) to your college career.  Sometimes, though, one path may be much more worn than another - it seems like everyone chose to run around the rock rather than over it or finish their music education degree in five years instead of four.  If there is a successful path that others have taken, it stands to reason that you could be successful there, too, so don't feel the need to reinvent the wheel every time.  Keep your mind open to those paths less traveled... but only if they won't trip you up, literally or figuratively!

4. Invest in Quality Equipment

Buy the good shoes in the right size, and you'll avoid injury. Buy a good instrument and good tools and the good cane, and you'll never regret it.
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5. Practice Slow and Fast

Five time world champion triathlete Javier Gomez is famous for saying "if you want to race fast, you have to train fast."  The three key workouts for runners are speed, hills, and endurance - practice being fast, practice being strong, and practice persevering.  In music preparation, these are the same principles, and we all often neglect at least one.  Practice being fast: drill short motives at or above performance tempo, but only one or two intervals at a time to grow accustomed to moving quickly and precisely.  Practice being strong: build your performance muscles through long tones and scales that make sense for your repertoire.  Marriage of Figaro?  D Major at pianissimo and double tonguing at your excerpt tempo.  Mozart Concerto?  B-flat Major in staccato sixteenth notes and wide interval intonation at forte.  Practice persevering: balance focused work with putting trouble passages back in context, and use long tones as a way of building muscular endurance with your abdominals and embouchure.  You will perform how you have practiced, no matter how that is.

6. Find Your Pacer
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When you participate in a large race, there are experienced runners called "pacers" who hold up signs with goal paces and finish times on them, and they run the race as their sign reads for people to follow based on their individual goals.  If you want to run a half marathon in under two hours, go find that guy or gal in the neon tank top holding the 2:00 sign and stick to him/her like glue.  In music, this is not a simultaneous experience, but you can find a collection of people whose careers you admire and explore how they paced to get there.  How did the top orchestral principals study and practice to win their auditions?  Where did your admired college professors study, teach, and play before arriving at their current institutions?  Be proud of your goals, and go find your pacer.


7. Take Care of You

When you are tired, sleep. When you are hungry, eat. When you are frustrated, take a break. When you are in pain, stop.
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8. Commit

Skipping workouts and eating extra donuts will not earn you a personal record race time.  Playing every other day or sitting in the practice room on your phone will not win you an audition.  Long term results require long term work, and you must be ready to commit.

9. Spit to the Side

Last but not least, this one is perhaps my favorite.  Sometimes runners need to spit (yes, literally), and one of the worst things you can do is turn to the side and hit someone right behind you.  My record in a race is being spit on twice - not pleasant.  Look before you clean out your bocal, and remember that your success does not necessarily mean someone else's failure.  Or at least someone else's shoe covered in spit.  Be kind to those around you, and best wishes in your continued lessons on the road, in music, and in life.
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On Resolutions

1/10/2016

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Happy new year!

Tis the season for fresh starts, new goals, and the grand promise of resolutions.  But why do we set resolutions?  Tradition tells us to, certainly, but most of us have a genuine interest in bettering ourselves.  In fact, many of us feel the need to do so in the same ways:
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With such great goals, why do we fail?

Typically, I fall into the resolution death trap trifecta - too many, too big, too vague.  "Be kind to yourself."  "Actually practice scales."  "Get in shape."  In an effort to create a reachable, improved version of myself in 2016 (as well as keep one of my resolutions AND test my own advice!), I checked in with some resources on goal setting.

Advice is everywhere.  One author at Psych Central implores us to make "nourishing" resolutions in a "goal-friendly environment", one from The New Yorker suggests that the most successful resolution is a well-timed resolution, and a third at U.S. News and World Report insists that written resolutions are the only ones that count.  My interpretation is to combine these and combat the trifecta - pick a few breakdown-able, specific goals and track them in writing.

What works for you in setting resolutions?  Share below!

To do as I say, here are my 2016 New Year's Resolutions, categorized as a means to limit my resolution frenzy.  (If you don't care about my intellectual, physical, or professional ones, skip to the bottom for the musical.)
​
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Physical:
Complete at least one Olympic distance triathlon, tentatively scheduled for Des Moines Triathlon (September) with a possible early bird Accel Triathlon (July).
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Intellectual:
Read the following ten books:
  1. Pulitzer Prize Winner - Orphan Master's Son (in progress)
  2. Newbery Winner - Brown Girl Dreaming
  3. Best Seller - Girl on the Train
  4. Should Have Read - The Art of Wind Playing (completed)
  5. Translation - Love in the Time of Cholera
  6. Memoir - Words WIthout Music
  7. Advice - The Professor is In (in progress)
  8. Nonfiction - Dark Matter and the Dinosaurs
  9. Poetry - Annotated Glass
  10. Friend's Recommendation - (position vacant; inquire within!)
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Professional:
Blog monthly.
​Thanks for reading January's!
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Musical:
Listen to one new artist or composition every week, not required to be classical or instrumental. (As I write, I am listening to Martinu's Nonette​, though… cool stuff!)

​And yes, I will try to practice my scales,
 too.
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On Tomatoes, Timers, and Flow

8/30/2015

1 Comment

 
The following post is dedicated to delayed reactions, repeated efforts, and times of percolation.

After a concentrated experiment to kick off the new semester, this return from my blog hiatus also marks a confident return to a practice routine.  I was first introduced to the Pomodoro Technique by my colleague Dr. Brent Weber during our time together at the University of Georgia, and since then I have wrestled with an approach that made logical sense but never seemed to work for me.

In summary, the Pomodoro Technique works as follows:
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Video and more information available at pomodorotechnique.com.
You have a project or series of tasks, you divide them into digestible units, you work for a set amount of time on each unit, you break up the monotony with strategic short and long breaks, and you win. Makes sense, right? 

For years of my on-again-off-again relationship with pomodoros, however, we could just never see eye to eye.
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Until 2015 Cayla: "Pomodoros - good in theory, terrible in practice."
I encountered a series of difficulties that may seem familiar for anyone attempting to create successful practice result and time goals:
  1. Setting unspecific performance goals.
  2. Misjudging appropriate goal complexity for time allotted.
  3. Practicing angrily.
  4. Prioritizing practicing fast over practicing right.
  5. Feeling trapped by excessive boredom and restrictive timelines.

My growing experience in pedagogy helped solve the first two, and delving into mindfulness and psychology research helped with the second two, but the last one still eluded me.  I was terribly bored.  All the time.

So what if I tried techniques from other things that used to bore me?  I turned to running, one of my favorite mind-numbingly-boring physical exercises, and the epiphany I had been seeking for years hit me square in the face.  When I started getting bored running, I found ways to change my scenery more frequently.  What if, instead of one passage for 25% of a practice session, I did one measure at a time for 5-10%?

One week ago, I attacked this with gusto.  I photocopied all of the music I needed to perform in ten days' time and literally cut it into chunks - one measure chunks, to be exact - and I shortened my time restriction to ten minutes - shorter periods than I had used since before college.  The result was magical.

I began to access a flow state multiple times per practice session.  Hours slipped by without anguish.  Technical tempo barriers increased exponentially and without tension.  Endurance was a nonissue.  I felt unstoppable.
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One measure, at my mercy.
I attribute this entirely to finding my own personal cocktail for experiencing as many flow triggers as possible in a short period of time.  Of the 17 different accepted triggers (many of which are social and not applicable to individual study), this shortened and more focused pomodoro design allowed me to relate to all of the following:
  • intensely focused attention
  • clear goals
  • challenge/skills ratio balance
  • familiarity
  • sense of control
  • close listening
  • creativity

The shift in excerpt length required me to change my concept of goals from larger skills (response in the low register) to specific instances (low B overblown, but only at louder than mezzo forte and if staccato).  The shift in timing increased adrenaline and anxiety (then again, so did using a giant, constantly visible timer).  The best part, though, is that the process freed me from mandating perfection - when the timer goes off, work is done, if only for now.

After years of skepticism with this particular technique, I am actually shocked to finally find a permutation of duration, goals, and preparation situation that works for me, and that has sparked a great deal of curiosity.  If any of you try this approach, please share... What timer duration is best for you?  What types of goals?  Where in your recital/audition/jury preparation cycle is this best?

With that, my writing timer is going off, and it is time for a short break.  Happy (and efficient) practicing!
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On the Impossible Bucket List

12/10/2014

7 Comments

 
"I could never do that."
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*blink*
We have all said this at some point, but I'm not convinced we know how much.  In only the last 24 hours (and only in the arts), I have heard the following:
  • "I could never double tongue like that."
  • "We just can't make that kind of sound."
  • "I had the heart of a dancer, but never the feet."
  • "Even if I practiced for 80 years, I'd never be able to play that."

These grow and branch out, one by one, to become a tree of impossibilities looming over our careers.
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I call this one "Boy and Beethoven 4"
Fairly recently, I've become more specific with what I call my "Impossible Bucket List," and I challenge you to, as well.  This bucket list would include repertoire and techniques that at one point (maybe even now) you labeled as impossible, something you would never have the fundamental capacity to manage.  Then, pick something and check it off.

Please don't misunderstand.  Checking off does not mean perfecting something you deem impossible.  Checking off means giving it a real shot.  The rolling up your sleeves, 110%, elbow grease kind of trying.  For me, this has been via double tonguing (2011), the doctoral audition process (2012), and the Gubaidulina Duo (2014) and Maslanka (two days ago) Sonatas.

I hear you.  "Yeah, yeah, Cayla.  Stop bragging.  Anything is possible.  Whatever."

Nope.  You know what?  They were all nearly-laughable hot messes of experiences.  But you know what else?  I don't think any of them are impossible anymore.

My point is not to say that everything is possible right now with focus and hard work.  You're tired of hearing that.  My goal is not to encourage you to focus on perfecting something inappropriate for your development level.   That would be irresponsible.

My point is that no one knows if something is truly impossible for you, and my goal is for you to challenge your own definition of possibility.

Power up.
Just try.
Make a few messes.
It might be awesome.
7 Comments

On the Potential of Awesome

9/9/2014

2 Comments

 
Do you remember the first time you thought your instrument was awesome?

I was a freshman at the University of Georgia, and a doctoral student performed Andre Previn's Sonata for Bassoon and Piano, and I am pretty sure my mouth actually dropped open.  I was so nerdishly giggly and head over heels in love.  I swore that I would play it "when I was ready" (whatever that meant to 18-year-old Cayla). I didn't even listen to it again for a long time, purely out of fear that in the harsh light of a second listening I would fall out of love.
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I did in fact play it later (see a clip from my first doctoral recital here) and will again this coming spring.
It has not been until years later, though, that I realize what actually happened in that moment.  I thought the bassoon and its music were awesome.  After that performance, I started hearing the potential for awesome in everything.  There was a good bit in Saint-Saens, there was some in Mozart, there was a lot in Vivaldi, and most recently there was way more than I expected in Gubaidulina.  From that point on, everything new could potentially be knock-me-to-the-floor awesome.

So I'll ask again: do you remember the first time you thought your instrument was awesome?

In addition to being a warm fuzzy and self-assuring sentiment, this realization has motivated me through the tough practice sessions lately.  While I've written before about the tools of slow and the dangers of angry practicing, this is even more fundamental.  For me, this has been the answer to the "why am I doing this?"

These past few weeks, I have been working on David Maslanka's Sonata.  In a break from one particularly tricky section, I wandered my way onto Instagram:
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Pouring in the blood, sweat, and tears for the potential of awesome is one thing.  For years, that has been enough.  Now I realize that I work not only to realize the potential of awesome in a performance, but also to potentially create a moment where someone first realizes that the bassoon and its music are awesome.  That music as a whole is pretty awesome.

What if you were the moment someone realized music is awesome?

Now get to it.  Go be awesome.
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